Nothing has changed I still no that if I left I’d make sure I left this world. Can’t bring myself to speak to one of nurses. Anyway the lady I promised that I would talk isn’t I. Today. Whether she is on tonight I don’t know.
My journal is beingused loads. I’m kinda alternating between using kindle and phone and writing with having to hand my charger in. Got my 2nd phone on charge atm.
I think that they are keeping tabs on my eating or should say non existent eating. I haven’t eaten in four days. Just can’t face sitting In a room full of other people who will see what I don’t eat. Will see me eating.
Anna made me trash all the food I did bring. Literally trash. Open all the food into a bag and had to stamp on it 10 times.10 time only.
Even now I’ve got the pangs and rumbling that my stomach needs food but after spending so long being able to ignore them I can do that all over again.
I’m trying to talk to people but am too shy.